Loathing The Love
by MoreThanAMuggle
Summary: After Harry defeats Voldemort, Harry retreats to The Burrow. There he is forced to confront his feelings for Ron, the question is: wll harry be able to accept himself for who he is, will Ron accept him, & the wizarding world. Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is set after Book 7, basically everything but the epilouge. This is set the summer after the last war. This is my very first please enjoy and REVIEW!  
I need Critism!  
Disclaimer: I do not own anything, including Harry Potter and anything in the Harry Potter World. 

It was a humid summers day as Harry and Ron went for a swim in the lake behind The Burrow. Ron had just gotten out of the water complaing about something along the lines of "I'm paler than the ghoul in attic Harry". Ron stretched out on the beach towel, his broad shoulders on touching the edges of the towel, his long legs hanging off the end of the towel. Harry could'nt help but take notice in Ron's well toned body, the water dripping off his six pack, his ass, good god his ass.

"Harry come lay with me" Ron said with hope in his voice, "your paler then me"  
Harry was now verbally attacking himself for the erection he had received just looking at Ron's body. "Ron the waters to perfect, I don't want to get out." Harry said swimming further out into the lake, now his gut twisting for lieing to Ron. "He is your damn friend" Harry said under his breath, he then put his head under the water and screamed, tears mixing in with green water. Minutes latter Harry stumbled out of the water, stumbling on his own emotion. The sun was in the Western sky and it wasn't nearly as hot as it was only an hour earlier, that is temperature wise that is. Harry wished dearly that his head was under Ron's muscled arms, not only for the emotional comfort but but the sand that was mixed with gravel was not comfortable at all.

"Harry did you ever wonder how you would now when you where in love, what it would feel like"  
"Yea sometimes" Harry replied feel his insides twisting yet again knowing that he had lied. In all honesty Harry had never had to wonder such a thing, he had loved Ron forever. From the first time he had allowed his eyes to lock with Rons in the first year, his heart had belonged to Ron. Harry shuddered, Harry knew he would never be with Ron, it was wrong. Even if it was socially acceptable Harry was nothing compared to Ron, he was the exact opposite of Ron, ugly, boring, and scrawny.

Ron stomach growled, interupting Harrys thoughts. Ron sat up and looked at Harry and said:  
"Lets go get some food mate, I'm starving and I think there are some left over kippers from breakfeast"  
Harry just nodded, he didn't talk very little around Ron, he wasn't ever sure if he could hold it all back, and he stuttered and hated looking like a fool.

Ron got to his feet in one jump and offered Harry his hand, Harry took Rons hand and pulled and tried to pull Harry to his feet but Harrys hand was still wet and he slipped. Harry saw the ground heading straight for his face and put out his hands and grabbed at anything to attempt to lessen the blow. Whatever Harry had grabbed was not helpfull for it fell to the ground with Harry. When Harry looked up blushing for his foolishness, he almost died, for there was Ron with his shorts around his ankles. Rons ears where redder then the time Harry walked in on Ron and Hermione makeing out and Hermione's top had "slipped off just secounds before". Harry allowed his eyes to wonder up the front on Rons body pausing for a secound to look at Rons penis. Harry then redirected his eyes to Rons nose beacuse Harry could not look Ron in the face.

"H-h-hey Harry can I have my shorts back please" Ron penis was now hard and Harry pretened not to notice and removed his hand form Rons shorts.  
Harry just smiled at Ron and Ron smiled back.  
Ron then turned on his heel and almost Ran back to The Burrow, leaving his towel in the sand.  
Harry just let his head hit the ground.

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When Harry arrived at The Burrow he did a quick run through to make sure that everyone was still there and safe. George was now living there now that he had gotten out of St.Mungos. He still isn't quite rite ever seince Fred's death and Harry new that he was the one who had caused this. Ron was not the only Weasley in fact he looked none of them in the eyes, he had caused them so much pain, the loss of there brother, friend, buisness partner, comedian... Harry could never forgive himself for it.

"Harry My Dear!" Mrs Weasley said pushing Harry into a chair in the kitchen and handed him a plat of potatoes and roast beef with pumpkin juice to drink. "Thank you Mrs.Weasley" "Harry" she teased him by slapping him on the arm "you really must call me Molly"  
Harry had not heard the last part for he was preparing himself to be hit again, when he realised that he would not be hit again he just smiled at Mrs. Weasley who smiled back. When Mrs.Weasley walked he allowed himself to relax a bit his muscles relaxing.

The rest of the night rushed by in a blur as Harry worked on his essay that he would send in with his Auror school application. Harry planned to be joining in the Winter, he could still join in the fall but he couldn't be away from the few people he still had to love for that long. As Harry climbed into his bed oposite of Ron he little out a whimper, he knew how close he wanted to be to run rite now. As Harry climbed into Rons bed he said to himself "Even Ron sleepwalks". However in the dark Harry could not see the smile that broke over Rons face as Harry slid his arm around Rons waist.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Yet again I would like to say that, I own nothing, sadly it all belongs to JK Rowling and not me.

A/N: God, I was going to wait for some freakin' reviews but no one has and I have so much more to say333

Ron didn't fall asleep that night, with Harrys arm around his waist he found it impossible. The feeling would regularly send shivers shooting up his spine. Ron deep down always has had deeper running feelings for Harry, but he had never truly confronted him. It was Harry Ron thought about when he had been kissing Hermione, the way Harry rode his broom, his hair flying carelessly in the wind, when it was just Ron and his hand on those lonely nights, it was yet again Harry. However, Ron knew that this arm around his waist was no more then a simple accident, he wished he knew what Harry mumbled before he was in Rons bed. Then it Ron and he said aloud: "If I kiss him, these feelings would disapear". He knew it was a lie, that these where just his greedy emotions takeing over him, however he turned so carefully in Harrys grasp and with his face centimeters away from Harrys face, he let out a small breath and with that Harrys wand was at Rons chest, and Harry yelled "STUPEFY!" Ron had been stunned.

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Mrs.Weasley woke with a fright, "Arthur" She said trying desperately to wake he husband "Arthur wake up, ARTHUR WAKE UP"  
"Molly, honey, I'm usually in the mood, but this really is much to early"  
"Oh shut up you stupid prat" she said, but even with her fear she let out a giggle "Arthur I heard a spell from upstairs, please go check it"  
"Molly, you know the Aurors put defensive spells around the house, you know better then me that no one could of gotten in, you really shouldn't let your fears get the best of you"  
"I know, lets try to get back to bed we don't have to be up for another three hours" Molly laid back down, however did not go back to sleep for at least a hour.

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Harry used his shaking hand to get his glasses trying to figure out who his silent asailant was. Harry knew Ron was a deep sleeper but good god.

As Harry managed to get his glasses on him he was shocked to see Ron on top of him, after the enital shock wore off he was actually quite turned on and focused all his energy not to allow himself to get to turned on.

"Ron what are y-y-ou doing on top of m-m-me?" Harry asked but only got a look from straining eyes, Harry realized that Rons lips where puckerd and where inches from Harrys own lips.

"W-w-where you just trying to kiss me Ron" Harry let out a soft moan as he began to cry into his pillow. Ron felt his insides turn to mush as he wished he could say something or do anything to reassure Harry but he couldn't move at all and he knew he would just have to wait for the stun to loose its affect.

It took about 5 minutes before Ron could control move his lips again the stun wore off in his toes and moved up his body.

"Harry, I woke up with your arm around me, I just figured that maybe this is what you wanted"  
Harry then let out a loader sob. then saying all he could choke out "Its exactly what I wanted, you jurk, thats the problem"  
Harry waited for Ron to hit him, he knew that even though Ron was the one trying to kiss him but Harry still prepared himself for the relentless bashing he was about to receive.  
However nothing no longer mattered to Ron, only Harry, he could feel everything in him relax, he knew he didn't loose his best friend.  
"Harry" Ron laughed, which only made Harry cry harder"Harry listen, I don't see the problem then"  
Harry looked up into Rons eyes he wanted to touch Ron, he wanted to put his hands on Rons face or just hold Ron close to him and feel the heat radiate off Rons body.  
Ron then raised his hand to lay it on Harrys arm, but when his arm was halfway to laying it on him Harry shivered and Ron laid his hand back down.  
"Please Ron, p-p-please just hold me" Harry whispered so low that Ron could barely hear him.  
Harry then rolled over so he wasn't looking at Ron and waited for the hands to be touching him, he shaked eventually curving into Rons grasp.  
Eventually Harry thought to himself. Why Me God, Why?

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Well into August Harry every night would crawl into Rons bed always scared that Ron would hit him or yell. Of course Ron never did though, in fact Ron never said anything to Harry as they laid there every night before bed. Eventually the horrors of what the Dursleys had done to Harry left him when he was with the Ron, the touch of Ron made every horror disapear. Harry and Rons relationship grew emotionally, each more then prepared to take in each others emotional highs and lows. As Harry took in the love Ron had for him, Harry realized that this no longer was a who is gay and who is straight thing, this was a who loved who thing, and Harry knew he loved Ron. 


End file.
